Chapter 34, Part 1: Pie-Related Schemes

ALICE

She didn’t know how, but Vlad’s pie was definitely part of a pie-related scheme, not that she had even a moment to focus on it.

Jimena had been back in her usual form, sniping and pushing Alice out of the way. She was performing to the camera, but Alice noticed she wasn’t putting much energy into her baking.

Bailee, usually organized and pleasant, was instead rushing around to chop walnuts and roll sugared berries for the topping on her pie. It was insanely ambitious, even for a showstopper.

Dylan was painstakingly rolling out dough and cutting decorative shapes. He was also overly-ambitious, but unlike Bailee, that was his MO.

Alice shook her head, it didn’t matter what they were doing. It mattered what she was doing. Her dough was all prepped and ready to go. She just needed the ingredients for her filling. She waved at one of the producers, “Bathroom break please!” 

Summer nodded and put a flag on her station, signaling the cameras to avoid filming until Alice made it back. 

She walked out of the tent, taking up a sedate yet purposeful pace, but instead of heading inside the mansion, she pivoted and ran.

Pumping her arms as hard she could, Alice sprinted down the hillside and towards the maze, careful to stay out of sight of the tent’s windows. She whipped along the maze’s pathways following the directional signage that the museum installed to keep tourists from getting lost. 

By the time she reached the exit, she felt like her lungs might collapse in her chest. Panting heavily, she half-walked, half-limped to the small vegetable garden alongside the estate’s east border. 

Glancing around to make sure no one was coming, Alice let a curl of magic fall from her fingers, willing a perfect quality apple tree to burst forth out of the ground. It was so healthy it practically shimmered. And so what if a few other apple trees joined it?

Why look a gift horse in the mouth?

She snatched an apple off the branch, taking a bite. It was perfect, tart, and delicious.

Glancing at her watch, Alice moaned. To avoid taking too long, she’d have to sprint all the way back. 

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Inside the tent, Alice wiped the sweat from her brow and set about adding her illicit ingredients to her pie. Was she God of Running? No. Not by a long shot. But she was damn good God of Agriculture. 

It was a struggle, but she managed to get her pie in the oven. If she was honest, her sprint was more like a jog, so she bumped up the heat to speed up the baking and make up the lost time.

Still panting, she downed a glass of water and gave Vlad a dirty look. It annoyed the ever-living shit out of her that his pie was finished and cooling on his counter. He frowned, motioning at her oven. 

“Pie-related scheme,” she mouthed back at him. Like she didn’t know how to use an oven! 

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VLAD

Alice burnt her pie. Vlad knew even if she couldn’t smell it. She would be furious when she found out, but this was why his decision to join the contest was so wise. It was much less likely that they would both fail. 

Not that he needed to worry. The homemaker’s overly-ambitious pie failed to bake in time. He could tell it was raw as soon as it came out of the oven because he’d turned it off when she was distractedly grabbing ingredients. Those lessons at Gwendolyn’s house had come in handy.

He felt no guilt about his actions. Alice’s life was on the line, and while the Elder-most manuscripts said one had to earn The Owl of Undoing, there was no rule against cheating. 

Jimena came in fourth place, and he could tell Alice was almost dizzy with schadenfreude. That Jimena threw an actual tantrum on camera and tossed a sack of flour at one of the producers just made the experience that much more enjoyable.

Dylan skated by in third place, having somehow managed to complete his pie on time. Vlad found it difficult to believe William had even bothered sleeping with the sim. He had quite enjoyed telling the vampire that he was in denial. 

Denial. 

What other delightful terms might one learn in therapy? No wonder Caleb waltzed around with such a smug sense of self.

It was now down to him and Alice. Rory, who Vlad had never liked, was doing his best to draw the announcement out. Was there any reason not to kill him? Alice had not expressly stated that they should keep him alive.

Though, she had not expressly stated that they should kill him either. He had time to make the call, perhaps he’d mention it to her?

“Alice, your pie was amazing. The judges laughed until they cried with unrelenting joy! But ultimately, the crust was burnt. This is the finals; you have to bring your A-game. That means in First Place; we have Vladislaus Straud!” 

Rory fell all over himself with praise. “What an inspired victory! Such command of flavor! King of Taste! Now, folks, make sure you tune in next week where we’ll be putting the cake in cupcake…”

Vlad reveled in Alice’s glare. It was so angry, so withering. Leaning over with undisguised glee, he whispered in her ear, “Remember, victory is the only thing that matters.”